I'm A Professional

So last weekend I went to a German Music/ Art Festival. And there was a lady with a typewriter who, for one dollar, would write you a story.

My friend, Fielding, bought one. But before the woman started she was like, was there anything you wanted incorporated. Fielding looked at me and I said "I'm open to anything."

This is what happened.

I've even thought about ways to kill... Death.

My hair is at a length that it stands up without me putting shit in it. THOUGHT YOU SHOULD KNOW. Also I do have a shirt on but it is strapless. NOT TAKING NAKED SELFIES FOR YALLS. Uhuhuhu or am I.

Also you need to all watch the Hogfather. And other Discworld shit. CREYS.